X Factor 2009 | The Grand Final | Stacey Solomon is Out

The grand final (part 1) of the X Factor 2009 aired on Saturday the 12th of December 2009 and brains of Britain Stacey Solomon got kicked out leaving Olly Murs and Joe McElderry to battle it out to be X Factor 2009 champion. This episode was dragged out over 2 hours which was about an hour too long if you ask me but ITV make a fortune from the advertising to fire away boys. It started off with the usual dramatic music and introduction of the judges. Dannii Minogue came out wearing a grey one shouldered dress with some gold sparkly earrings. Very Christmasy. Cheryl weirded it up yet again wearing a white and black mermaid style dress with feathers on it. She could hardly walk and Simon Cowell had to help her walk down the stairs. God knows how she goes to the toilet. I thought she looked a bit out of sorts the whole episode like she was nervous and about to cry. Maybe she has more trouble at home. Maybe she met Tiger Woods. Anyway the contestants came out and horse faced Stacey Solomon was wearing a really short blue dress with a gold trim around the collar. Joe McElderry wore a simple blue shirt with black trousers. Olly Murs wore a black waistcoat with a skinny tie and white shirt.

We were treated to an insight into Stacey Solomon's home life via a visit to Dagenham Working Mens club and King Solomon High School. Lots of kids were kept in for detention so they could cheer on our down to earth star. Stacey wore a leopard print top with a pink jacket which had black chunky buttons. There were a few interview segments where Stacey did her usual gasping for breath thing in between sentences. It's like she forgets that she has to breathe while she's concentrating on forming sentences. She then came on stage wearing a black and white zig zag print dress and performed live for Dagenhams finest. For her first X Factor song she sat on a stool looking really leggy and sang What a Wonderful World. A few close ups of Dannii trying to squeeze out a tear which I don't think is possible since her tear ducts have been closed off from too much botox. I'm not going to put down what the judges said as it was mostly repetitive rubbish. At this stage they have to say everyone is great otherwise they look pretty stupid for putting them through to the final. Simon did say that Stacey has been a nervous wreck the past few weeks to which she did her usual "Fanks". We then found out that she has a crush on Jade Goody's ex-husband Jeff Brazier as he was live from Dagenham with more of those detained kids. Stacey then said she was a big fatty who loves pizza.

Olly was up next flying around in Simon's helicopter since he doesn't mix with the scum in cars. They did the same thing and went to his old school where paid kids held up signs saying we love Olly etc. ITV are really blowing the budget this year. Olly Murs Fred Perry shirt was on display yet again as he went to his parents house. Simon had butterscotch angel delight and complained that it needed more milk. Olly also had some awful looking scarf on. So his live performance was the usual cheese. He sang Superstitious and it was terrible with his stupid dancing and stupid big head. There were lots of dancers all around him and at one stage Olly Murs slipped and almost fell. The cheesiest part was when he slid through the dancers legs looking up their skirts. Great. We were treated to some screaming fans in Colchester.

On to Joe McElderry now and he was back in his home town of South Shields. Cheryl needs to sack the stylist seriously. She was wearing a white sweater with black skulls on it topped off with a skull scarf. Terrible! Joe remarked about how easily Cheryl fitted in to his family when they went to visit. It made me wonder if the stripper that Ashley Cole affair cheated on her with could fit in to their nice little family? Then Joe was seen performing on a stage in Gateshead in front of hundreds of fans. He wore a blue hoodie with a grandad style collar. For his live performance he sang Dance With My Father Again. It took me ages to work out which song it was because I didn't have a clue what he was saying. Then Cheryl's mate Kimberley Walsh or whatever her name is. The one from Girls Aloud with the massive forehead? Yeah she was in South Shields with the fans where we found out a local baker named Declan has been selling Joe Cookies in his shop. He brought two with him to prove it. He said they were outselling the sausage rolls. Some other lady claimed that she has changed her name to "Vote Joe".

Back to Stacey Solomon for the special guest duet. This time she work a red sparkly dress and she sang Feeling Good. Michael Buble came out to help and they did a decent job together. At the end Dermot tried to speak to Michael Buble who simply said I didn't understand a word of that...Dermot apologised for his English accent and repeated. I wonder how Mr Buble got on trying to understand Stacey Solomon? They started on about how Michael Buble met the queen and she loves his album then he made a joke about the Queen going in to Tesco to buy it.

Olly Murs came on next singing Angels and Robbie Williams came out for the duet. It made me cringe. First of all Robbie Williams looked spaced out again and messed up his timing. He started singing too early and had to go back and sing the same part twice for it to fit. The Ego doesn't share the stage with anyone so he proceeded to take the limelight off Olly Murs anyway he could. This included standing looking at him judgmentally between lines and trying to sing over the top of him. Robbie Williams looked really weird like he was on something. The whole thing was awkward with Olly looking nervous throughout. There was some strange violent man hugs in there with Robbie looking like he was giving Olly a good squeeze. Perhaps because Olly stole his whole routine. At the end Robbie overdid it again getting the crowd to chant for Olly. He started going on about how 110% is required and 112% if possible which has never been televised. I was hiding behind the couch at this point.

Joe McElderry was out next singing Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me with George Michael. This actually worked pretty well with George being much more humble than Robbie and letting Joe shine. George Michael waved to Joe's mum at the end since she's a big fan.

Another song each. Stacey Solomon sang Who Wants to Live Forever by Queen. She work a black sparkly dress with a large train at the back. Olly Murs sang Fool in Love by Tina Turner. This was exceptionally cheesy with all the dancers dressed in white. Joe then sang Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word.

Robbie Williams was back out to sing his new single. I guess he didn't embarrass himself enough the first time around. It was really terrible and yeah he still looked spaced out. We then found out Prince Harry was there with his girlfriend Chelsy.

In the end Stacey Solomon got kicked out and she claimed to be happy finishing third. I don't think she's realised she's out and wouldn't be surprised if she turns up tomorrow and tries to sing. Olly and Joe battle it out to be the X Factor 2009 winner!

Part 2

The show started off in familiar fashion with the judges coming out. Dannii Minogue opted for a gold sparkly dress showing off plenty of cleavage. Cheryl went for a black puffball dress which was a bit see through. We were shown the crows in Colchester for Olly and the crowds in South Shields supporting Joe. Then the final 12 burst out singing Never Forget by Take That. They were all miming again of course and it was a treat to see Jedward and Rikki Loney's eyebrow all over again.

On to the individual performances. Olly Murs started with Twist and Shout which was as cheesy as every with his crappy dancing. He kept it smart and simple with a black suit and skinny tie. He then burst into the Thriller dance he did a few episodes back with the back up dancers helping him out.

Joe McElderry chose to sing Don't Stop Believing by Journey and did a decent job. He was also dressed in a black suit and tie.

The first guest of tonight was JLS with Alexanda Burke singing a medley of their songs. The highlight being Bad Boys by Alexandra Burke. From there we went to Leona Lewis stripping all the heart and soul out of Stop Crying Your Heart Out by Oasis. If you ever want a great song wasted just give it to Leona she can do robotic singing like no other. She looked a bit weird in a gold and black mermaid dress. It looked like she had been nailed to the stage.

On to the contestants again where they both sang their versions of the winning song Life's a Climb. If anyone's interested it was actually a song by Miley Cyrus in the states. I thought Olly did a great job with this you could really feel the emotion in his voice. George Michael came on to plug his Christmas single which I thought was a bit strange since he's in direct competition with the X Factor single. Then Paul McCartney came on to sing Baby You Can Drive My Car where all the contestants came out to help like he needs it. He then went on some crazy multicoloured piano to sing Live and Let Die. Simon joked that he was through to the next round and he hugged Dermot to celebrate. I did like his Beatles style military jacket.

In the end Joe McElderry was named the X Factor 2009 winner. I wonder what height Joe McElderry is because he looks really short even next to Dermot O'Leary. He had to sing The Climb over again and started laughing half way through I don't think he could believe that he'd won. All the other contestants came out and Rachel Adedji grabbed the mic at one point to congratulate him then give him a big kiss on the cheek. Aww!

Web Directories

Till next new folks, Joe McElderry is your new X Factor champion! I'll have to amuse myself with Britains Got Talent 2010 in the meantime! Look out for the X Factor Auditions 2010 coming next year!

X Factor 2009 | Michael Jackson Night | Live Show 9 | Semi Finals

Well it is getting down to the final weeks of X Factor 2009. Tonight's episode on Saturday the 5th of December 2009 was the semi finals so a very important night for all the remaining contestants. The theme of the night was Michael Jackson/Jackson 5 and once again each of the 5 contestants sang 2 songs.

Well continuing the trend of ugly outfits on X Factor this week was no exception and Cheryl and Dannii did not disappoint. Dannii Minogue wore some Star Wars inspired red floor length dress that kind of looked like a toga draped across her one shoulder. She paired the outfit with these huge gold and brown jewel chandelier earrings. I honestly don't know how those things did not rip off her earlobes! Cheryl Cole came out wearing a dress that looked like she had been attacked and half ripped off. It was half a black top with a light pink dress draped or ripped open over the top. She paired with the a huge chunky gold necklace made up of little squares.

Round 1 Michael Jackson

Olly Murs was up first and he was wearing a white shirt however, I couldn't tell it if was a signature Olly Murs Fred Perry shirt or not. He sang Can You Feel It and it was not a great performance. He had backup dancers dressed in multicolored dayglo outfits jumping around the stage like idiots. For some reason during the performance Olly decided to do some weird robot marching, I didn't get it. After the performance Louis told Olly that he had the whole package to which Dannii added he didn't only have the whole package but he was holding one too. She was referring obviously to the infamous Olly Murs bulge! So finally one of the judges has finally noticed and perhaps will get him some pants that aren't skin tight!

Joe McElderry sang She's Out Of My Life while wearing a white shirt and black trousers. Once again Joe did an outstanding job with the song and the performance he put a lot of passion and emotion into the whole song. Cheryl was trying to squeeze out a tear when the camera zoomed in on her. Louis told Joe that he could sell millions of records. Simon said it's getting annoying because I keep saying this every week, but you're getting better and better. He also added that it was once of the best versions of She's Out Of My Life he has ever heard. Wow high praise indeed Joe! Cheryl told Joe that it was better than anything he's ever done.

Stacey Solomon aka horse face actually made an attempt to be sexy wearing a tuxedo jacket, black bustier, black Fedora hat with sparkles, and black leather gloves, and no pants I might add! However, anytime Stacey tries to be sexy she fails miserably even before she opens that stupid mouth of hers. She sang a jazzy version of The Way You Make Me Feel and was out of tune for most of the song. During one point in the performance the male backup dancers placed chairs in front of Stacey to walk across, which surprisingly enough she managed to do in high heels. Another thing I didn't get is why were the male backup dancers wearing black leather chaps?! Louis said that it was the wrong song choice for her. Cheryl said that Stacey was a yummy mummy and Simon told her that it wasn't her, it was silly, gimmicky, and too cabaret.

Danyl Johnson finished out the first round dressed in a black shirt and black leather trousers. He sang Man In The Mirror while the images on the screens behind him showed scenes of the devastating effects of climate change however, I think this went over many people's heads since they had to keep asking what all that was about. He had a bit of a shaky start to the performance and I thought maybe he had a cold by the way his voice sounded, but once the choir kicked in he had a strong ending. Louis just kept moaning about the scenes of climate change and polar bears, then stupid Dannii chimed in and didn't get the polar bears either. Dummies! Simon said that Danyl was incredible, on the money, genuine, and brilliant.

Round 2 Free Choice

Olly Murs was first again for the second round of songs. He wore a tan shirt once again not sure if it was an Olly Murs Fred Perry shirt and a black skinny tie, it actually reminded me a Hans Solo's outfit in Star Wars. He sang We Can Work It Out the Stevie Wonder version. Olly just demonstrated more of his ridiculous dancing during the performance, it almost looks as though he's having convulsions onstage and someone should hold him down with a tongue depressor! Louis told Olly that you remind me of Jay Kay from Jamiroquai with your silly dancing. Good I'm glad at least Louis has noticed that his dancing is stupid!

Joe McElderry wore a silver/gray shirt with a white collar and sang Open Arms by Journey. Once again I can't find a bad thing to say about this performance, he did a great job. Joe's grandma Hilda had said she would like to be on one of Simon's shows so Simon told Joe that gran Hilda can come on any of my shows.

Stacey Solomon picked a better song for the second round but a worse outfit. She wore a silver toga floor length dress with sparkly belt around the waist. The dress was like sack and just made her look fat. Stacey sang Someday from West Side Story and this was a much better song choice for her as her voice is suited to power ballads and not pop songs. Cheryl said that the performance gave her goosebumps.

Last of the night was Danyl Johnson who was looking smart wearing a black suit and white shirt. He sang I Have Nothing by Whitney Houston. This was a much better song choice for Danyl and this performance was definitely better than his first. Simon said that Danyl deserves a place in the final.

But will he make it to the final we will have to wait for the results tomorrow....

Danyl Johnson Kicked Out!

Well tonight was the last results show before the finals. Dannii came out wearing a one shouldered gold sequined mini dress. Cheryl looked like a hooker wearing a black wedding dress! Cheryl had on a black mini dress at the front with huge puffball sleeves and long black train at the back like I said resembling a wedding dress.

The contestants mimed Wanna Be Starting Something by Michael Jackson mixed in with Please Don't Stop The Music by Rhianna. All the contestants were dressed in silver and white outfits. No doubt the miming was terrible once again the only upside is that it is almost over!

First guest performance of the night was from Lady Gaga who sang Bad Romance and honestly it looked like she really couldn't be bothered putting any real effort into the performance. All the dancing and singing was pretty half hearted. While she was actually singing live, I think I would have preferred she mimed since she was off key for most of the song and it was grating. She began the performance wearing a outfit that made her look like a bat and for some reason she was in a huge bathtub with her backup dancers. What one thing had to do with the other I have no idea and I don't really care to find out. Then she took off the bat wings and turned into a cat I guess because she told the audience to get their paws up, once again I have no clue. She then went over to play the piano which had a toilet as a piano stool but she never sat down on the toilet so what was the point of it being there?! After the performance she had a pretty awkward interview with Dermot. He Lady Gaga were she found a bathtub so big and she flatly said Simon's house. He then asked if she had any advice for the contestants and she spewed some crap about being yourself, oh sure Lady Gaga because you're not a brand and image conjured up by the record companies at all right?

The second guest performance of the night was from Janet Jackson who did not sing live but instead mimed. I guess she was on the show because it was Michael Jackson the night before, otherwise she hasn't had a hit song in years! Which is why she had to begin the performance with her last hit All For You and merged that song into Make Me. The whole thing was nothing really special to be honest, she totally should have sung Nasty Boys!

Dermot announced that Danyl Johnson received the lowest number of public votes and was out. Danyl sang Man In The Mirror for his final performance and then there were 3. The finalists contending for the top X Factor spot are Olly Murs, Stacey Solomon, and Joe McElderry.

Next week special guests include: Michael Buble, Robbie Williams, and George Michael

Instead of all 3 finalists waiting until Sunday to hear if they will be kicked off or not, someone will be kicked off on Saturday leaving only two contestants to battle for the top spot on Sunday December 16th, 2009. Stay tuned....

X Factor 2009 | Take That And Elton John Night | Live Show 8 | Joe McElderry Flawless Performances

Well tonight's show of X Factor on Saturday the 28th of November 2009 was a double header with the theme being both Take That and a second round of Elton John songs. Dermot was looking particularly snazzy tonight with his gray pinstripe suit on. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for Dannii and Cheryl. Dannii Minogue was wearing a Greek inspired white floor length skirt with a pretty scandalous high slit up the middle, a white top with a corset style black belt. Cheryl Cole is just looking more and more ridiculous with her outfits as the weeks go on. This week she was wearing a half golf half black puffball dress that had one long sleeve and the other arm was sleeveless.

Round 1 Take That

First to kick off the night was Danyl Johnson. H e was wearing a simple black t shirt and black trousers. Danyl said because he had done a number of ballads over the past couple of weeks he wanted to change it up with a fast song. He chose to sing Relight My Fire with dancers backing him up who wore gold outfits. The song was obviously not his style and I felt he had trouble keeping up with the pace of a faster song. So this performance wasn't really that impressive. Dannii said she wasn't a fan of the body rolls when he was dancing. Cheryl said that it was a camp as Christmas. This must be a Geordie saying because I have never heard that before!

Lloyd Daniels was next wearing a gray button down shirt and black trousers. He sang A Million Love Songs however there was no love or any emotion behind his singing to be honest. It's like he goes through the motions singing the song but he's actually thinking about what he's gonna eat for dinner or something. Simon agreed with me and said that it was a bit mechanical and there was no fire in Lloyd's eyes.

Olly Murs surprisingly enough was not wearing a Fred Perry shirt tonight. Instead Olly wore a white shirt, brown waistcoat, and brown trousers. He sang Love Ain't Here Anymore and it was just cheesy and old fashioned as usual. Pretty much a boring and forgettable performance. There were reports this week that Olly was meant to be the best man at his brother's wedding however, because of the competition if he was to stay in it he would miss the wedding. Well Olly, here's hoping you get sent home this week and make that wedding because you annoy me! Dannii said that the sparkle wasn't quite there in your eyes. Simon said that even though Olly was in the bottom two last week he didn't sulk or complain once this week.

Joe McElderry aka Geordie Joe was next to perform. He was wearing a black leather jacket, white t shirt, and black trousers. He sang Could It Be Magic and did a really good job with the performance. The whole thing was a bit theatrical but it worked for this song because that's what Take That are known for in their live shows. Dannii told Joe that he absolutely smashed it! Simon said that it was brilliant and he was in control of the performance the whole time and commanded the stage. Cheryl said that it was flawless and that she loved him to pieces.

Next up was Stacey Solomon aka horse face. She wore a black mini dress with silver circle detailing. I felt that she was off key for a lot of the song and once again it was just lacking emotion. It was just not a good song choice for her. Louis told her that she did it for him.

Simon took his opportunity to congratulate Robbie Williams on his engagement. OOPS! Simon must have not read the story that the whole thing was a big fake out and Robbie isn't engaged at all.

After her performance Stacey went to speak with Dermot who clearly hates talking to her which I love! Dermot ended up doing an impression of Stacey speaking that was dead on and pretty funny. When he asked her how she felt this week she said that the competition is fun and it just keeps getting funner. Dermot once again pointing out what an airhead she is corrected her grammar and said funner, you mean more fun? Ha ha stupid Stacey!

Onto Round 2 Elton John

Lloyd was up first this round weaing a black suit jacket with tails, white shirt, black suit trousers, all complete with a cane. Once again there was no emotion! Still thinking about dinner I guess. Lloyd tried to dance during his performance of I'm Still Standing but it just ended up looking robotic. His backup dancers wore red top hats. Louis said that you're just about standing there. OOH! He also added that we're looking for a star not just nice. Cheryl fired back at Louis by saying you haven't got anybody still standing! Double OOH! Louis defended himself by shouting in the charts I have! Simon was loving the whole cattiness going on and just sat back laughing and clapping his hands. Simon told Lloyd that he felt it was a silly song choice and looked like an amateur dramatics production, it was just an inappropriate song for you.

Next was Danyl who wore a black suit jacket, white shirt, and black trousers. He sang My Song and I must say he did a much better job this time than on his first performance. The slower songs and ballads suit him the best. He had a lot of power in his voice and emotion. Louis said that he loved everything but the children's choir that backed Danyl up at towards the end of the song. Dannii said that it was much better than the first song. Cheryl simply said good. However, Simon corrected Cheryl by saying it wasn't good it was sensational! He also had a dig at Louis by saying don't be rude about children singing, you're like a dark cloud blotting out the sunlight. Dermot added was it to do with the rule book? Louis just laughed and took it in good jest.

Olly sang Saturday with his whole performance centering on a boxing theme which I found really weird. He used a ring announcers microphone to sing into and his backup dancers were dressed like ring girls wearing purple bra, boxing robe, and boxing trunk hotpants. Olly wore a purple button down shirt and black trousers, how do these two things fit together? The song was more upbeat and more entertaining than his first however, it was still super cheesy. Also, the Olly Murs bulge made a return tonight! Gross, he needs some looser trousers. Louis told Olly that there was something missing. Dannii said that it was an absolute knockout. Simon said that he put his heart into it. At this point the crowd started chanting OLLY! When Olly went over to speak with Dermot, Dermot presented him with a red boxing robe that said MURS on the back. I think a Fred Perry shirt with MURS on the back would have been more appropriate but oh well.

Joe chose to sing Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word. He was wearing a purple button down shirt and black trousers. Joe definitely poured loads of emotion into the performance and it ended up being impressive. Louis said that you've got it all! you were born to do this! Dannii told Joe the feeling that he conveyed in the song through the lyrics was exceptional. Simon said that he was absolutely gobsmacked and that the boy had turned into a man. He added that it was by far his favorite performance of Joe to date. Cheryl just came out with the same nonsense you make me proud to be a Geordie. Well to me it seems as though Joe is racing ahead of the other contestants with two flawless performances, hopefully he keeps this up!

For her second performance Stacey wore a floor length red dress while laying on a piano covered with a sheepskin rug. I found this all to be pretty cliche! She sang Something About The Way You Look Tonight. While it was much better than her first song I still didn't feel like it was a stand out performance. Louis said that he preferred the first song she did. Cheryl said that she looked slightly uncomfortable. Simon told Stacey that she's not a big belting singer like Leona or Alexandra and if she keeps trying to do that with her songs she's going to end up sounding like a wedding singer.

Results to follow tomorrow....

Lloyd Daniels Kicked Out

The results show made for some interesting fashion choices once again. Cheryl was wearing a black mini dress with one long sleeve that had a puffy shoulder pad. Dannii wore a hot pink mini one shouldered origami type dress, she also had a weird curl fohawk hairdo.

For the miming portion of the show the final contestants mimed to Scissor Sister's I Don't Feel Like Dancing. I guess this song choice was to reflect the truly campy nature of the whole performance. The boys were lowered from the ceiling holding onto a rope. Stacey sat onstage wearing a pink sparkly mini dress. Olly was wearing a red cardigan once again something old fashioned that grandpa would wear! Danyl was up to date wearing a black military jacket, Lloyd had on a yellow check shirt, and Joe had on a plain dark blue button down shirt. I think the miming was worse this week because since less contestants remain in the competition, there is less to distract from the fact that they aren't singing.

First guest performance of the night was from Alicia Keys. She had on a red leather jumpsuit and had her hair in a sleek and straight shoulder length do. She started out by singing Empire State Of Mind then merged into her new single Doesn't Mean Anything she then transitioned into one of her best selling songs No One. I have to say she put on a good and entertaining performance, got the crowd involved, and was actually singing live which is more than I can say for some of the bigger name stars that have been on the show. Dermot asked Alicia who she thought would win the competition but she said she would leave it up to the public because she didn't want to influence any votes. Dermot was amazed by her performance as well and said that wasn't just one song and Alicia laughed no we wanted to do a mini concert for you! Dermot jokingly said to Alicia if she wanted to just stay onstage and talk and she joked back that yeah she wanted to take over Dermot's job.

Unfortunately the next performance was by Rhianna who didn't have the same stage presence or personality as Alicia Keys. She performance her new single Russian Roulette which was just a terrible song. Rhianna was also singing live because she was off key for most of the song. The whole performance was just over dramatic and boring. During her interview Rhianna had the personality to match her performance BORING!

The bottom two this week: Olly Murs and Lloyd Daniels

At this point in the show the contestants no longer sing for their survival it comes simply down to the lowest number of public votes.

Lloyd received the lowest number of votes and was kicked out. The whole interview with Dermot after the announcement was like pulling teeth and by the way Lloyd didn't show any emotion happy, sad, angry when the announcement was made, I think this kid is robot! Lloyd just said thanks to everyone and that he wants to be recognized. Wait recognized as what? Dermot then asked what the highlight of the show was and Lloyd couldn't come up with an answer so he just said everything. So along with no emotion the kid has no personality. Dermot then tried to ask what his favorite performance was and he simply said Bleeding Love.

Lloyd then got to perform A Million Love Songs for the final time. Unfortunately for Lloyd the final performance was much better than last nights! After the song the rest of the contestants came onstage to hug him. Yeah that whole part was just lame.

Next week should be an interesting performance by Lady Gaga and Janet Jackson....

X Factor 2009 | Wham George Michael Night | Live Show 7 | Sexy Olly Murs

Well tonight's show on Saturday the 21st of November 2009 should have been a campy song spectacular, but instead was fairly disappointing. Of course we need to begin by talking about the judges outfits. I really don't know what was going on with Cheryl Cole's outfit tonight, but she was wearing a hot pink mini dress with sweetheart neckline paired with black studded ankle boots. She also wore a big black bow in her hair that made her look like Minnie Mouse. So basically it was a cross between a brown haired Barbie, Minnie Mouse, and a hobo. Honestly, the way her hair was styled she looked a hot mess like she'd just gotten out of bed or had sex. Also, she was all greased up like once again she had just had sex or was going to the wrestling after X Factor. Dannii Minogue was actually the normal one this week wearing a colorful tropical floor length flowy halter neck dress.

First to kick off the night was Lloyd Daniels. For some reason he looked like he had aged in the past week and appeared to look more mature facially. Hmm, perhaps since Ashley Cole affair doesn't seem to have time for Cheryl you know it wasn't him flying down to London to give her a roll in the hay so perhaps Cheryl made a man out of Lloyd by sleeping with him. We know Ashley Cole naked pics are flying around all over the internet...Anyway, this week all the contestants got to take a day to visit their friends and families back home. Lloyd went back to Treharris in New South Wales to his mum's house to visit his parents and grandpa. Finally, this week someone decided to fix that awful hair of his and Lloyd had a new hairstyle tonight. Lloyd's hair was spiked up and he looked a lot better although on the downside he did kind of look like Nick or Aaron Carter now. Lloyd sang the song Faith while wearing a white t shirt that had the image of a hoody printed on it, so a faux hoodie t shirt? I found the whole performance really cheesy as usual and he should really be part of a boy band rather than trying to be a singer on his own. He definitely didn't have the same attitude as George Michael to pull off a song like that. Simon must have thought it was cheesy as well because during the performance he was holding his nose either to stifle a laugh or because someone farted perhaps? Louis commented that he loved everything but the voice and he has a great image. Simon said that he wasn't bad at all and he looked at lot better, also that this week he started to feel believable. Dermot got a dig at Louis black and white polka dot bow tie by saying he's not the only one who's got a great image Professor Yaffle. Yaffle? That was the best Dermot could come up with?

Next up was Stacey Solomon aka horse face. She went home to visit her mom and son Zack in Dagenham. She also went to visit friends at Havering College. I don't know how she can have friends since no one can understand what she is saying! Stacey wore a black mini fitted dress with a sparkly sequin middle panel while she sang I Can't Make You Love Me. Personally I'm going to pull a Louis here and say that was cheating since that is actually a Bonnie Raitt Song and not a George Michael original. Stacey was a bit pitchy during the song especially in the beginning. Louis told her that she had star quality. Simon said that it wasn't as good as last week, this performance was a little too mechanical.

Now the act everyone waits all week for Jedward. John and Edward went back home to Dublin to their parent's house. They also went to visit friends at their school at the Institute of Education. One of the twins friends, Diandra, was wearing a Jedward t shirt that said We've Got It and had a black silhouette of the boy's heads and blond spiky hair. Jedward also visited their running club at the Dundrum Athletic Club. There another friend wore a blue t shirt that read I Heart John and Edward. I was so hoping they were going to sing Wake Me Up Before You Go Go but they didn't and I was extremely disappointed! How could they not choose to sing that song?! Instead they sang I'm Your Man mixed with the Wham Rap. Jedward wore matching white t shirts that had Choose Life in hot pink writing, they also had white/hotpink sport jackets, white trousers, and multi-colored trainers . This week I was surprised because the twins actually looked a bit uncomfortable doing the crazy, ridiculous dancing. All the backup dancers wore silver shiny suits, however most of the male dance were topless which I found a little weird. The boys stood on scaffolding above the stage, was this because they were scared that Calvin Harris would come back to get them? Most of the backup dancer were breakdancing and spinning on their heads. Jedward looked most confident while they were rapping so I think they need to keep that up each week. Dannii told the boys that this week the singing was in tune but the rapping was out of time. WRONG! Dannii the rapping is the only thing their good at! Simon said that it wasn't George and Andrew, it was more Andrew and Andrew. He also added that Louis has turned them into his version of the Action Man Dolls. However, even Simon could not deny that Jedward is an unstoppable machine. Louis finished by saying that the show would be no fun without them.

Simon introduced Danyl Johnson by getting a dig in at Jedward by saying just singing is Danyl Johnson. Danyl went back to visit his flat in Arborfield. He met up with his housemates and they all went for a drink down at the Swan Inn in Reading. He also went back to visit Elstree School where he used to be a teacher. Danyl wore a brown leather jacket, white t shirt, and black trousers. He sang the song Careless Whisper and did a decent enough job, but I didn't think it was anything extraordinary. Dannii told Danyl that he sang the song perfectly. Louis said that he tried too hard and that Simon was making it very difficult for him. Simon fired back by saying Louis would have you up on the scaffolding wearing a silly shirt! The crowd began chanting Danyl in support.

Olly Murs went back to Whitham to visit his parents, where he claimed that he wasn't a mummy's boy but you could clearly see he is! He went to his local pub The George with some friends for a few drinks. He also visited his old workplace the Climate Energy Offices. On a side note I also noticed Olly was wearing a funky Liberte t shirt with a black and white eagle on it and I wondered where he got it? For the performance however he kept it simple wearing a black shirt and black trousers. He sang Fast Love and was out of tune for most of the song. This was really not a good song choice for his voice. All his backup dancers were wearing black PVC suits and gyrating trying to be sexy, but it just ended up looking stupid. Louis said that everything about Olly Murs is real. Someone in the crowd shouted OLLY WE WANT YOUR BABY! Both Olly and the judges just laughed. Simon said that Olly would have no problems with the chics went he leaves this show, he also said he was great.

To close out the night was Joe McElderry aka Geordie Joe. He went back to South Shield in Newcastle to visit his parents and grandma. He also went to Newcastle College Rye Hill Campus to visit some friends. He sang Don't Let The Sun Go Down On Me wearing a black biker jacket, gray t shirt, and black trousers. Although once again this is technically not really a George Michael song but rather an Elton John one he did a really good job. I have to say that Joe is winning me over believe it or not. He was definitely the best performance of the night by a long shot. After Joe's performance all 4 judges stood up to give him a standing ovation. Unheard of! Louis agreed with me and told Joe that he was the best performance of the night. Of course after that compliment Louis had to go into his rant about cheating. I mean at least George Michael sang the original with Elton rather than just a cover like Stacey! Simon was a bit riled by Louis comments and said new rule! we're not going to stop you from speaking! He also added that you've got your silly, stupid little rule book who cares what you think?! Cheryl just smiled and gave Joe 2 thumbs up.

Jedward Kicked Out! Oh No!

The shocking results show began with Cheryl wearing another hot pink mini dress with a very plunging neckline and looking all greased up again! Dannii wore a floor length plum shift dress with a black belt around her waist.

All the contestants mimed Wake Me Up Before You Go Go by Wham and it was Joe who gave it away this week since his lips weren't moving in time with the music. Olly Murs switched up tonight from his usual Fred Perry shirt to a Kappa shirt. All the contestants were jumping around like fools wearing similar white outfits with neon colors. Stacey Solomon got to wear something a little different which was a white dress with hot pink hearts on it. The whole performance was super campy, but not in a good way.

Dermot announced tonight that the X Factor charity single was #1 in the charts this week and Leona Lewis had the #1 album.

Susan Boyle aka Subo kicked off the performances tonight by singing her new single Wild Horses original written and sung by the Rolling Stones. Come on they're having Subo sing covers to launch her career they need to come up with some original material! Anyway there was a noticeable difference to Susan's looks, Simon gave her the super Hollywood makeover that's for sure. She really didn't seem to put any emotion into singing the song so I found the performance a bit dull. When Dermot went to interview Susan it was really awkward with long pauses. She just said things she's said a million times before like it's bloody fantastic and look out my public. Look out for what Susan? Another stint in rehab perhaps?

Mariah Carey was up next and her performance was recorded earlier in the week since she couldn't be there on Sunday. I was suprised to see Mimi miming her songs since she's usually known for singing them live, I guess she's getting a little bit lazy these days. Speaking of lazy she's another one that couldn't bother with good original material and sang a cover of I Want To Know What Love Is by Foreigner. At the end she had a rainfall of butterfly confetti which Dermot seemed to really love for some reason. Basically she didn't have anything interesting to say just the usual nonsense that she loves Simon.

The Bottom Two were: Olly Murs and Jedward. When this was announced the crowd went crazy booing Jedward and chanting OLLY!

Jedward decided to sing No Matter What by Boyzone and I was really surprised they did a pretty good job actually singing. Although, during their song they looked scared and like they couldn't put any effort in the performance or stage presence. It was almost like they already knew they were going to be voted off this week hmm... couldn't someone like Simon Cowell have already told them to try to save face for the X Factor but they will secretly still get some silly record deal anyway? Once again after the twins performance they received a big round of boo's from the crowd.

Olly chose to sing Wonderful Tonight by Eric Clapton and I have to say he did a pretty bad job. He was pitchy throughout the song and he really doesn't have enough power in his voice to pull off any big songs.

Simon voted to keep Olly and added if you boys go tonight I will really miss you, Louis voted Jedward, Cheryl voted Olly but blew kisses to Jedward and one of the boys I think Edward caught the kisses, and Dannii didn't know whether to judge this as a singing competition or not while she kept asking the question no one decided to answer her and she voted for Olly.

Olly pretend to look like he felt sorry for the twins but you know he didn't really. Jedward said that they hope Stacey and Olly go all the way. They also added that being on X Factor is the coolest place to be in the world.

Next week the guests will be Alicia Keys and Rhianna...

X Factor 2009 | Queen Night | Live Show 6 | Jedward Spectacular

The theme of tonight's episode on Saturday the 14th of November, 2009 was the song of the legendary band Queen. I must say that tonight's episode was filled with drama! To kick off the night as the judges walked onstage they played Flash Gordon, why not a Queen song? Both Cheryl Cole and Dannii Minogue looked better tonight. Cheryl was wearing a sparkly black mini dress with a V neck and black high heels. Dannii was wearing another flesh colored floor length strapless flowy style dress. She was wearing a very distinct chunky silver stone or maybe seashells necklace.

Simon kicked off the cattiness for the night by retaliating to some comments made earlier in the week by the singer Sting. Personally, I would have thought that Sting was too busy off saving the rain forest to watch X Factor, but hey you learn something new everyday. Apparently Sting said that all the contestants on this year X Factor were a bunch of karaoke non-hopers. Ouch! Simon fired back by saying Sting I extended an invitation for you to come on the show and impart you knowledge to the contestants that need your help. Very cheeky and I loved it! Simon also replied to the backlash he has received on his decision to keep Jedward last week. He said I will never use tactics, and I didn't feel strong enough about either contestant, I trust the public. He finished by saying to Lucy that he was very proud of her and she left the show with dignity.

Ok onto the singing!

Jamie Archer met Brain May and Roger Taylor from the band Queen, except he was wearing an AC/DC shirt what's up with that? For the performance he wore maroon satin trousers, a black tshirt, and black trousers. Jamie sang a less than average version of Radio Gaga. His voice really did not mesh well with the Queen song he picked. Before commenting on Jamie's performance Dannii said pyros excite me which I found a little weird. Anyway, she said that he couldn't match his voice with the style of song. Louis really stuck the boot in tonight by telling Jamie that you're only an ordinary singer with a small voice and big hair. Ooh! Cheryl told him that she didn't like his hair and Jamie taken aback said WHAT?! She clarified by saying I don't like it curly, but I'm glas you got rid of the jeans this week. Jamie responded the same as always by saying the public are the only ones that count. Hopefully the public will kick him out this week!

Lloyd Daniels began the night looking like a big idiot in the footage before he met Queen he said I don't know who Queen is, I wasn't born until the 90's. Come on now! That's no excuse people born in every decade know who Queen are. He wore a red and black check shirt, skinny red tie, and black trousers. Lloyd sang Crazy Little Thing Called Love with his backup dancers wearing black PVC mini dresses and hearts. Cheryl promised that tonight's performance would be cheeky however, it really ended up looking more cheesy than cheeky. Although I will say that the song was a good choice for his voice. On a side note he's only supposed to be 16 how come he has a tattoo on his wrist and furthermore what is the tattoo supposed to be? Anyway, Dannii said that it was his best performance yet. Simon came back with one of his famous similes by saying you're like a puppy taking part in the Grand National. He also added that this competition is too big for him, but at least you're having fun.

Olly Murs was next. There was a whole big story before his performance about how he had an accident with his hand. Apparently he and the twins (Jedward) were fooling around hitting a punch bag and Olly accidentally hit the metal bar instead of the bag. It resulted in him cracking a knuckle above his pinky. The footage then showed him getting full arm cast and a sling. Is that really necessary for a broken pinky?! I think they were hamming it up and playing on sympathy personally. I also have a conspiracy theory that Jedward moved the punch bag on purpose to try and knock out the competitors one by one. Look for other "accidents" in the coming weeks.... This is the thing that really gets me while Olly had to have a full cast only the day before, for his performance all he had on was a wrist guard! Olly sang Don't Stop Me Now wearing a fitted gray Fred Perry shirt, skinny gray tie, and black trousers. I'm obsessed with where to buy Olly Murs Fred Perry shirt. At one point Olly tried to look cool by sliding to the edge of the stage, instead he slipped and nearly fell. Once again his voice did not suit this type of music at all. To make up for that fact he started doing stupid shoulder shakes, robot style dancing, popping the Olly Murs bulge, and gyrating his hips. Scandalous! This dancing really had nothing to do with Queen so just looked ridiculous. Danni said that the song swallowed his vocals. Louis said that Olly reminds him of Robbie Williams, Gary Barlow, and Will young except probably better. Probably? That's not very convincing Louis.

Joe McElderry aka Cheryl's little brother aka Geordie Joe was up next. He wore a gray shirt, gray waistcoat with a hood, and black trousers. He had about 20 backup singers helping him out while he sang Somebody To Love. While I don't usually like Joe I have to say this week he put on a good performance and his voice really suited this song. I was pretty entertained during his song. Louis felt that the choir helped him an awful lot. Simon fired back by saying I'm assuming that's in your little rule book? He also said that he felt Joe was better last week. Cheryl thought Joe was wonderful and told Louis and Simon both to shut up since they kept interrupting her.

Jedward I have to say is quickly becoming my favorite act on X Factor. It seems as though I'm not the only one, Simon said in the before performance footage that they've won him over a little bit. Once again Jedward wore a Beatles and Michael Jackson tshirt to meet Queen, where's the respect people? I also thought it was a little weird that another day they were wearing matching Custom Deluxe hoodies. For their performance Jedward sang Under Pressure. However, nothing is what is seems with John and Edward instead of just singing the David Bowie/Queen version they mixed the song with Vanilla Ice's Ice Ice Baby. Word, I loved it! The performance began with someone pretending to spray paint John and Edward's name on a piece of paper, to which the twins busted through and one of the twins tripped and nearly fell. Olly's revenge? I also liked the fact they brought back the matching silver suits and winged silver trainers. The backup dancers wore half black half white suits and did old school hip hop moves like the running man.

Drama occurred during Jedward's performance. A random audience member wearing a pineapple on his head ran up on stage and put his arm around one of the twins, he then proceeded to bend over with his bum facing the cameras and patted his bum as if to say kiss it. Jedward laughed it off and kept on singing. It was later revealed that the mystery pineapple man was actually music producer/singer Calvin Harris. He said he was inspired to run onstage because he wanted to make a mockery of the show. The show is a joke and it should be treated as such he added. He also added that Simon Cowell is not really a music fan and has a frightening stranglehold over the music charts in the UK. When Calvin Harris was asked who he wanted to win the show he stated Jedward. He said I would love them to win because where can they go from there? Not them, where can X Factor go from there? It's not a music competition.

Overall, I have to say the whole thing paid off since I found it highly entertaining. Dannii called Louis out on the fact that he broke the rules by having them sing Ice Ice Baby. She also said that their rapping was out of time, which I think she was wrong. At this point the crowd loudly starting chanting JEDWARD! Simon said I have to judge you not in the real world, but in Jedwardland and therefore that was your best performance. He also praised the twins for conducting themselves well during the competition. Louis was mad saying who was that idiot jumping onstage? Dermot O'Leary also praised Jedward for their composure while an idiot with a pineapple on his head that looked like their older brother.

After all that drama Stacey Solomon aka horse face was up next. She wore a brown strapless fitted floor length dress and a diamond arm bracelet. She sang the lesser known Queen song Who Wants To Live Forever and did a pretty good job. Cheryl said you sang your socks off. Simon said that by a mile she was the best performance of the night. Stacey gave a little air high five before going over to talk to Dermot. When he said her who that was for she said Dannii. He told Stacey she could go over and give Dannii a real one, so she went to the judges table and gave Dannii a high five. Personally, I think Dermot did this on purpose so we wouldn't be subjected to Stacey talking.

Last of the night was Danyl Johnson. He kept it simple wearing a black tshirt, black jacket, and black trousers. He sang We Are The Champions however he did so in a more soulful style. I felt that he was singing at too low a key for his voice, which didn't make this his best performance. However, the judges felt differently. Dannii thought it was his best performance to date. Louis told Danyl that he proved he's got it all. Cheryl told Danyl that he won her over and he looked really handsome. OOh!

Results to follow...

Jamie Archer Kicked Out!

The results show kicked off with the judges coming out the song Another One Bites The Dust by Queen, now my question is why didn't they play this song last night when it was actually Queen Night? Dannii looked a hot mess with her 80's crimped hair and flowy floor length green floral dress that had a very low V neck and high slit up the leg. Cheryl looked a bit better wearing a white knee length skirt that had a gold shiny panel on the front, this was paired with a white corset top with gold geometric line detailing.

The contestants mimed Bohemian Rhapsody in honor of Queen Week. Once again the miming has not improved one little bit! There were high notes that were sung in falsetto voices, no one on X Factor has a falsetto voice! The whole thing was just really campy. Brian May and Roger Taylor joined the contestants onstage playing the drums and guitar. Jedward was definitely into the song as they got to do the little Galileo bit. Somehow whoever produced tonight's song managed to make all the voices sound identical, not a good job.

Dermot asked Brian May who his favorite contestant is and he said I really like the girl. That's not a good sign when they can't even remember your name. However, he was referring to Stacey Solomon. Perhaps, Brian just couldn't understand a word horse face said like everyone else. Roger agreed that Stacey was his favorite as well.

Shakira performed her new single Did It Again. She had on a pretty weird outfit that consisted of a black sparkly top with the hips cut out of it, and a black sparkly tutu on top of black trousers. She had Japanese drummers backing her up and honestly they were the best part of the whole thing. Overall, the song wasn't catchy at all and all the key changes and voice changes that Shakira does during the song just made it annoying. Dermot asked Shakira if she had any advice for the contestants and she said don't be afraid of Simon.

Next the 12 finalists performed the X Factor charity single. The single supports the Great Ormond Street Hospital. All the proceeds go to the charity so I give them credit for doing something good. All the contestants wore similar all white outfits while they sang You Are Not Alone by Michael Jackson. I really found this to be in bad taste since everyone is jumping on the Michael Jackson bandwagon since he died. Also, come on it's the holiday season where everyone wants fun and poppy music, You Are Not Alone is definitely not fun. I didn't understand why they contestants didn't sing the song live but once again mimed it. It was so obvious because once again it didn't sound like their voices and Lucie Jones missed a word while she was miming!

The bottom two this week were: Jamie Archer and Lloyd Daniels

Jamie sang The Show Must Go On by Queen. It was a pretty poor performance, and the thing I don't get is that he knew his voice couldn't carry a Queen song the night before so why pick another one?! He just seemed to be screaming rather than singing.

Lloyd sang Paolo Nutini's Lay Down Beside Me. This was actually a good song choice for Lloyd since it doesn't require much of a voice range or high notes. He did a much better job than Jamie Archer.

Simon voted to keep Jamie, Cheryl voted Lloyd, Louis voted Lloyd, and Dannii voted Jamie.
So For another week in a row it was DEADLOCK. Jamie received the lowest number of public votes and was kicked out, yay! Back to the pub for you! Simon looked absolutely shocked with his mouth wide open just looking at the audience. He then came onstage and said I'm sorry to Jamie I probably let him down with the song choices. We've had a few spats but he's a nice guy.

Next week the guests will be Mariah Carey and Susan Boyle.

X Factor 2009 Auditions | Live Show 5 | Movie Songs | Arguments and Ghostbusters!

It was live show 5 on Saturday the 7th of August and the theme tonight was Movie Songs. There was no special guest mentor this week so we were treated to the X Factor contestants attending the new Disney movie A Christmas Carol. It always gives the contestants a taste of the good life before it's cruelly snatched away from their desperate fingers.

The judges came out to the sound of Star Wars being blasted out behind them. Cheryl wore a knee length black shift dress with a cross over the chest area. Dannii looked every bit the Greek Goddess with a floor length white one shoulder strapped dress with a high slit up the side.

Stacey Solomon was our first contestant and I'm really starting to wonder how they'll handle her if she win's the contest. Every time I hear her talk it makes me cringe with that stupid giggly buffoon like voice. Can you really see her being interview by Oprah? Nah me either. Her opening scenes were filled with her making strange pig noises that I think was her laughing. Anyway she sang Dusty Springfields Son of a Preacher man from the movie Pulp Fiction. It was pretty boring overall. They tried to turn Stacey Solomon sexy without much success dressing her up in black leather trousers, tank top and then topped off with a nice cardigan. Sexy! She had on a strange medallion as well with pearls on it. Cheryl said she looked sexy and confident. Simon disagreed comparing her to Chinese food as he didn't feel anything afterward only that he was still hungry. She blurted it I feel good in that bumbling idiotic way she speaks but Simon didn't catch it and had to ask her to repeat. The crowd goes wild and Simon I guess took pity on her and left it at that. Dannii said Simon Cowell is obviously out of touch which made me laugh for all the wrong reasons.

Olly Murs is the biggest cheese monger on here I really can't take him seriously. He came out in a black suit with skinny tie singing Twist and Shout by the Beatles. It's apparently from Ferris Bueller's Day Off. This was truly atrocious. At one stage he burst into the thriller dance routine with his cheesy dancers behind him. Louis said that he didn't like the silly dancing or song. Simon was drawing Louis dirty looks by this point. Dannii said he looked like he didn't believe what he was singing by this point the Olly Murs fan club in the crowd kicked into overdrive singing "Olly Olly" which drowned out the judges. I also noticed he has a unibrow tonight.

Lloyd Daniels was up next with those dead eyes of his. Seriously look into them there's absolutely nothing going on in there. The kid creeps me out. He was wearing a checked shirt and white t shirt underneath and sang Stand By Me. Lloyd Daniels is the only constestant who seems to be getting worse as the weeks go by. Tonight was terrible his voice was all over the place and he warbled his way through to the end. He went over to Cheryl at one point to sing directly to her which again made me cringe. Louis Walsh told Lloyd Daniels that he was out of his depth in the competition and that there are four other male vocalists who are better than him. Simon Cowell started on about how it was like having tea with your mum then I guess he realised he might be offending his own mum and quickly apologised. Simon told Lloyd Daniels that his voice wasn't big enough for the song.

Jamie Archer sang Crying by Roy Orbison claiming it was from movie called Gumbo that no ones ever heard of. At the end he said it was also in Mulholland Drive which is weird as I don't know why he didn't say this from the start. This would have saved us from having to listen to Simon and Louis arguing about who was cheating. He did a pretty average job with the song, didn't do anything for me to be honest. He was going to sing Unchained Melody at first with Cheryl saying it was a good idea to change this as it would have been cheesy. Simon pointed out that it was going to be the U2 cover version adding that you should look it up on YouTube! sweetheart. Nice and patronising. Louis then accused Simon of cheating by picking some obscure film.

Lucie Jones sang a song from Camp Rock (what?) called This is Me. She had a bad spot outbreak on her chin again they need to get this girl some Clearasil to sort out her acne. She wore blue jeans, brown boots, black sparkly top and a short black military jacket over the top. Simon said it was the first time Lucie Jones has made herself relevant. Cheesy pop rubbish.

Danyl Johnson was sporting a new shorter hair cut that made him look a bit like Ashley Cole which is maybe why Cheryl was complimenting him on it so much. He sang Purple Rain by Prince and was dressed all in black. He started off his song by sitting down on some see through platform. Simon said Danyl did an outstanding vocal with Dannii warbling on about something. Is he really supposed to take advice from Dannii Minogue??

Jedward! Oh Jedward you are starting to grow on me. Full Ghostbusters routine from these guys complete with boiler suits, proton packs, yellow toy guns, Ghostbusters Car, a few Ghosts and a girl dressed like Sigourney Weaver from Ghostbusters. They showed a clip at the start where apparently Prime Minister Gordon Brown had said that Jedward weren't very good. No shit! But they're entertaining the nation and especially all the kiddies out there. John and Edward said they had always wanted to be Ghostbusters when they were little but hadn't been brave enough. They were also spotted at the start wearing t shirts which said "Vote Jedward" which are bound to be a big Christmas hit...maybe. They started off the performance by sitting in the Ghostbusters car until some spooks came out to scare them. They did a little talking part again with Edward shouting, John save me! With John replying don't be a baby...My favourite part was when the Marshmallow Man came out at the end to join in on the second Thriller dance routine of the night. Dannii said that they either talk or rap but don't sing. I thought this was hilarious again. She's not even fit to give the Irish Twins advice. Simon even said they were good in a childish sort of way. Dermot thanked Louis for suggesting that Jedward were the the antidote for the recession. This was a little prelude to argument they were about to have.

Last up was another cheese monger Joe McElderry who Dermot introduced as Geordie Joe. Boring. He sang Circle of Life from the Lion King and was cheesy and crap. Most of the judges suggested he was more musical theatre than pop star with Dannii adding that he was the strongest male in the competition. Simon disagreed with this and then Cheryl started on about some rubbish about him being like her little brother which I've said right from the start! Fix! Louis and Dermot then started arguing with Louis pointing out that Dermot wasn't a judge but Dermot had the last laugh saying the audience was the real judge.

Results to follow!

Lucie Jones Kicked Out!

Dermot O'Leary kicked off the results show looking snazzy wearing a purple satin tie. Tonight when the judges came onstage they played the theme to the Superman movie which was a bit weird I thought. Anyway, Dannii did not look good tonight with her pageboy hairdo and strapless ivory knee length dress with white line geometric details. The only nice thing she was wearing was a silver heart necklace. Cheryl looked better wearing red/pink or if you want to be picky fuchsia colored mini shift dress. Cheryl definitely had the major hair extensions going though!

Why the contestants continue to mime a song at the beginning of the results show is beyond me. This week they mimed Hot N Cold by Katy Perry. All the contestants wore red/pink and tartan type outfits. Jedward must of really loved this song because they were really into the song and getting down. When Jamie Archer sang his voice was changed using a vocoder, come on that's not live! There's not much to say about this bit except that once again it was pretty cheesy.

Then it was onto some of the unseen backstage footage from Saturday. Stacey Solomon was being cheeky to Simon but it was beyond me what she said to him something about being vulnerable but I cannot understand a word horse face says!

Louis and Cheryl had it out when Louis told Cheryl that Lloyd was out of his depth and at least you still have Joe. Cheryl was angry at his comment and said yeah and you have John and Edward, good luck with THAT!

Jamie Archer claimed just because his song was unknown didn't make it cheating, but yeah I still can't find anything about that movie so I think it was. Simon snipped that Louis should have been a traffic warden.

Danyl Johnson commented backstage that Cheryl finally likes him because with his new haircut he looks like her husband. John and Edward came offstage and were comedic even then, Edward was so distracted by a girl that he forgot to keep up with John and talk to the camera.

Black Eyed Peas performed their new single Meet Me Halfway, and it was pretty terrible. Fergie made her entrance by being lowered onstage standing on a giant moon. Then Wil.I.Am came flying in over the audience and once onstage proceeded to play a keytar. The song was not catchy at all and the performance was pretty boring to say the least. When Dermot interview the Black Eyed Peas Wil.I.Am said that Cheryl was the coolest and Fergie commented that she had a crisis with her shoes and thanked Cheryl for letting her borrow hers.

After that Dermot called Louis mardy bum saying that they had made up and gave Louis a kiss on the forehead, aw.

Next up was X Factor winner Leona Lewis, she sang her new single Happy. She wore a strapless black sparkly sweetheart top and a full floor length black taffeta skirt. Also, I don't know who did her makeup for this but she looked like a tranny! With the white eyeliner and heavy black eyeshadow, big mistake. Once again this was another boring song with a performance that was nothing special. Alexandra Burke's performance a few weeks earlier really put this to shame. Leona also seemed to look like she had crazy eyes.

Right so the bottom two this week were a shocker: Lucie Jones and Jeward

Lucie sang One Moment In Time by Whitney Houston for her survival. She was off-key in the first part of the song and looked pretty nervous. However, towards the end of the song she got it together, sounded good, and looked confident.

Jedward sang Rock DJ by Robbie Williams for their survival. This was actually a smart move since like Robbie they cannot sing to save their life, but they are good entertainers. They did some crazy dancing during the song, kicked each other in the bum, and jumped into the crowd at one point. After their performance it was a mix of cheers and boo's.

Louis voted to keep Jedward, Dannii voted to keep Lucie, Cheryl voted to keep Lucie, and Simon was the wildcard by voting to keep Jedward even though he said he hated them all this time, he quickly changed his tune by saying I'd rather see John and Edward again and made the vote a deadlock.

Shockingly Lucie received the lowest number of public votes and was kicked out! She was obviously really upset and started crying, one of the twins tried to console her, but she pushed him away, ooh! However, when Dermot asked her for a reaction she kept it diplomatic and just said I'm gutted but John and Edward deserve to be here, they work the hardest out of anyone.

Can Jedward hold on? Tune in next week when the guests are Shakira and the X Factor contestants will perform the X Factor charity single for the first time...

X Factor 2009 Live Auditions | Rock Week | Cheryl's Awful Dress | Jedward Rock On!

Well it was rock week on the X Factor 2009 this week on Saturday 31st of October 2009. Yes it's Halloween and the scariest thing was undoubtedly Cheryl's absolutely atrocious dress. Wow who the hell thought that was a good idea. Cheryl was wearing some thigh high hooker boots in the style of Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Bad Start. The dress Cheryl wore was just awful! It was a black mini dress with like fan things covering her breasts that had little piano keys on them. It was then attached to some black dog collar round her neck. Simon had to warn her at one point to keep sitting upright as it was slipping down, Cheryl Cole had to pull it back up in to place. Dannii looked much better wearing a one shouldered, floor length bronze sparkly dress with lace detail and black high heels. Bon Jovi was supposed to be mentoring this week but there was no sign of him with no explanation as to why he wasn't there. Nice one X Factor! I also noticed that Cheryl and Dannii weren't sitting next to each other anymore. Dannii had switched seats with Louis. Perhaps she didn't want to sit next to Cheryl when she was wearing that horrific dress?

On to the contestants and Dermot referred to Cheryl as the Northern Rock. Not a tag she'll be delighted about I'm sure. Joe McElderry was up first moaning about the press in his opening scenes. Boring! Simon said Joe and rock were like a mouse and a tiger. He don't stop believing by Journey and I thought it was awful. Really really bad his voice didn't suit the song at all. Joe wore a leather bikers jacket and white nautical t shirt with anchors on it. He did a strange thing when he walked round behind the judges to sing directly to the crowd but you could see all four judges straining in their seats to turn around and watch the performance. Nice one Joe. There were two stupid dancers on behind him too doing some weird dance like they were in Dirty Dancing. Simon ripped in to the dancers at the end calling them Squiddly and Diddly. Cheryl defended them saying Simon doesn't appreciate contemporary dance. I'm sorry I just couldn't take Cheryl seriously tonight because of that dress. Simon Cowell said that Joe McElderry's performance was a bit limp which was right. Then we had the dress incident which resulted in Cheryl calling Simon a prat. Dermot also stated that the song was a Newcastle anthem. Seriously?

Lucie Jones was up next doing her best Avril Lavigne/Kelly Clarkson impression. Simon was right when he called her an actress last week. I thought Lucie Jones was crap too. She sang Sweet Child O' Mine by Guns N Roses and started the performance off by lying down on a gold couch. What that had to do with anything I'll never know. She was wearing a sleeveless checked shirt with a chain mail print tank top underneath. Very trailer trash. She also had a black chunky bracelet on. The performance was full of awkward moments most noticeably when she was posing next to a guitarist against the amps. Cheryl rather patronisingly said she was like a little Avril Lavigne this week. Seriously Cheryl Cole was talking down to someone she makes me laugh so much. Simon said Lucie Jones was boring last week but much better this week. Nah she was still boring.

Danyl Johnson seemed to be pissed off that he was in the last two last week and the amount of bad press he's had this week. Someone said he was more hated than Hitler on Twitter which seemed to really get to him. Why bother Danyl I could go on Twitter right now and say the same thing but who cares if some bum like me (or the other guy) says stuff like this about you? Grow a pair and get on with it. Anyway he was wearing a black waistcoat and white shirt this week and Danyl Johnson sang Aerosmith's I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing but it was pretty average it was like his heart wasn't really in it. Dannii said he looked like he's lost his mojo and was a bit out of tune. Cheryl said his performance made her feel uncomfortable and didn't do it for her. I guess the thing that really does it for her is a cheating husband eh Cheryl? Danyl's body language spoke volumes at the end he stood with his hands in his pockets dying to get off stage.

Lloyd Daniels continues to get worse and worse. I'd say he's at least on a par with Jedward now. They had him sitting on a throne with girls all round him kissing his face leaving lipstick marks everywhere. He was singing Katie Perry's I Kissed A Girl and I Liked It. I think it's about time this kid was kicked off the show, we're at the stage now where he's getting drowned out by the backing singers. I think Lloyd Daniels is only being kept in because of his looks. Louis Walsh was moaning again about the fact that he wasn't singing a rock song with Simon making fun of Louis for complaining. They started to argue over the top of Cheryl's comments then she told them both to shut up. I wish she hadn't and they could have drowned out her horrible accent. Goes right through me. I think Lloyd Daniels has a big following on facebook because they started talking about that but to be honest I don't really care.

Horse faced Stacey Solomon was up next and I'd have to say she appears to be the stupidest contestant who's been on the X Factor for some time. She says thanks with an 'F'. It looked like Dannii had forgotten her name at the start when she was introducing her. Maybe the Botox has leaked in to her brain. Stacey Solomon sang Somewhere Only We Know by Keane in a totally non rock fashion. Her vocals were good though but again she's cheating a bit. She wore a black dress with silver tassles over the top of black leather leggings and high heels. Louis said the song choice was boring which was right. Simon was talking about an X Factor miracle compared to last week.

Commercial break, they must have came back to soon as all the judges were just getting back to their seats from a bathroom break I guess. Jamie Archer was next up singing Primal Scream's Get Your Rocks Off. He had a black leather/PVC jacket on with a silver guitar motif on the back like all true rock stars wear. It was cheesy. Why is someone who wants to be a rock star on this talent show anyway? Go get yourself a band Jamie Archer. Why does he have that stupid towel in his back pocket does anyone know? To catch the bugs that fall out of his Afro? He looked like he was wearing a lot of makeup too. Louis said he wasn't a real rock star and was simply a Lenny Kravitz impersonator. Cheryl got a bit bitchy by saying the only reason we have rock week on the X Factor is because Simon has a rock artist. The audience didn't seem to like it too much probably because of the bitchy nature. Dermot was then joking about Louis reading NME and Kerrang.

Rachel Adedji wore a strapless pink leopard print dress with a black belt and sang One by U2. It seems that Dannii is determined to make her look like Rhianna even changing her hair to match this week. Louis commented that it was an emotional performance from Rachel. Simon said that Dannii was trying to make Rachel her clone with that hairstyle, Dannii fired back with a joke about Simon's hair. It would have been funny if she just left the joke alone but she continued to overdo it.

Ok now the time everyone's been waiting for... John and Edward aka Jedward as their fans now call them. They both wore long leather trench coats, ghetto blaster t shirts, and heavy eyeliner which did not match the song they picked at all! I have no idea what looking goth has to do with Queen, but anyway Jedward sang We Will Rock You by Queen. Once again the performance was over the top with dancers, motorcycles, fire. Again all this drama was need to try and hide the fact that Jedward was out of tune, forgot the word in parts, and were both totally out of time with the song. At one point during the performance they jumped into the crowd of backup dancers and were being lifted around. At the end of the performance a lot of the crowd was booing which once again makes no sense since they seem to be the most popular act on X Factor. All the judges minus Louis agreed that the look and the song made no sense. John and Edward looked like they were dressed for Halloween and overall looked pretty scary. Simon said that their performance was like night of the living dead and was out of tune.

Last of the night was Olly Murs. He wore a blue denim shirt and jeans. He sang Come Together by The Beatles. At one point in the performance for no apparent reason he decided to rip his shirt open!

I don't know but every week on X Factor seems to get weirder and weirder

Sunday 1st of November 2009 - The Results!

Rachel Adedji got the boot this week which is no surprise since she survived by the skin of her teeth a few times now. We started off tonight's show with the usual dramatic entrance from the judges. Cheryl wore something a little less disgusting tonight, a black top with shoulder strap crossover, sparkly trousers and black peep toe heels. Dannii wore a black satin knee length shift dress with black belt, black heels and puff sleeves. She had her hair crimped like it was the 80's.

The contestants came out to the usual mime routine singing Walk This Way by Aerosmith/Run DMC. They were wearing outfits in red white and black and to be honest they couldn't be any less rock if they'd tried. Why were they miming again? We had backing dancers break dancing and the contestants were jumping up and down like extras from High School Musical. Someone was hanging from monkey bars at one point. Stacey Solomon's accent was coming through in the song, "FANKS huhuhuhu!" you know how it goes.

We were treated to some backstage footage of Danyl Johnson crying after last nights performance, I think he was complaining about not being able to hear the start of the song. Louis was talking about Jamie Archer thinking he's a rocker but he's really a pretend Karaoke rocker. He also added that Jedward would sell more records than Dannii Minogue which is why she hates them so much. I think I've sold more records than Dannii though so I guess she hates me too?

Special guest Bon Jovi were then up singing We Weren't Born to Follow. At least they did it live but it wasn't very rock just a radio friendly dirge. Boring. Jon Bon Jovi has great teeth though. And hair. He advised the contestants to listen to every word Simon says as he knows his stuff. He didn't comment on the other three judges but why would he. One's there to be Simon's whipping boy and the other two are there for a bit of fluff. Dermot then wanted to high five Richie Sambora because it was a childhood dream. Simon then went on to make a big announcement which was that Cheryl's garbage single was still number one and unbelievably her album was number 1 also. It's frightening. Simon congratulated her and jokingly asked her to come to his record label. They both laughed and hugged and he kissed her on the cheek. Lets all laugh at how much money we can all make. Sickening. Simon went on to predict that Jedward would be in the bottom two how wrong can you be.

Last years runners up JLS came on to perform some over produced nonsense called Everyone In Love. They seem to be an American band now like it's an User or Ne-Yo song they're performing. The performance was very polished with a dance breakdown, fireworks on raising platforms and the crowd going wild. JLS definitely put on a better show than the mime routine of the X Factor contestants. Simon gave them a lot of praise saying acts like them are the reason that he does the show. Dermot then started joking about how he's still waiting for his merchandise from the band.

On to the results! Jedward go through to a chorus of boos from the crowd. We were left with Rachel Adedji and Lloyd Daniels with Lloyd complaining about a sore throat. Has he had a sore throat since the start of the show? No? Must just be me. Cheryl was getting the excuses in early saying Lloyd was poorly before he sang his second show. He sang You Are So Beautiful by Stevie Wonder and I thought he was once again out of tune. This kid can't sing. His voice broke a few times and he gave up far too easily with the high notes. He just couldn't hit the high notes and seemed to be looking for sympathy from the crowd. Rachel sang Stop Crying Your Heart Out by Oasis and to be honest she overdid the vocals quite a bit. She did a decent job though and put a lot of emotion into the song. When Dermot brought the contestants together Lloyd reached round and gave Rachel a squeeze on the shoulder for a bit of support.

Dannii chose to keep Rachel, Louis chose to keep Rachel, Cheryl choose Lloyd and Simon mistakenly said Rachel sang better than Olly. Louis had to correct Simon who then apologised saying he's not with it tonight and corrected himself. Despite the fact that he said Rachel sang better and everyone and their grandma realised this he still choose to keep Lloyd because he was 'sick'. DEADLOCK! The drama of X Factor is crazy. Rachel then got kicked out for having the fewest votes from the public, she started crying and looked gutted. Perhaps she's too much like Leona Lewis and Alexandra Burke to win X Factor this year.

Special guests next week are the Black Eyed Peas and Leona Lewis. Yippee!

X Factor 2009 Live Auditions | Big Band Night | Michael Buble | Danyl Johnson | John & Edward Still Here!

It was Big Band night on the X Factor this week with the episode being shown on Saturday the 24th of October 2009. Once again the show has been split in to two episodes with the results of tonight's show being announced on Sunday the 25th of October 2009. The judges upped the X Factor 2009 style stakes again this week with Cheryl wearing a one shouldered white floor length Greek inspired dress. This was complimented with a diamond hair accessory. Dannii Minogue wore a floor length sheer dark gray lace sparkly dress with chandelier silver earrings. Louis Walsh was back this week and I thought he looked terrible. He must have had a hard time with Stephen Gately's death as you can definitely see the difference in him. The mentor this week was Michael Buble since it was big band night.

I must say the best part of this episode was the fact that Louis Walsh and Simon Cowell were bantering back and forth the entire night and in some parts it got quite catty which makes it even more entertaining.

Olly Murs kicked off the night. He was wearing a white tuxedo shirt, black trousers, black bow-tie, and braces. He had the help of several female backing dancers. His backup dancers were wearing short black dresses and witches hats to tie in with the theme of the song he was singing. Olly sang The Bewitched theme song by Howard Greenfield and Jack Keller. For the first time in weeks Olly looked visibly nervous, big band is obviously not his cup of tea. He tried to cover his nervousness by doing stupid dance moves that really didn't work with the theme of the show this week. Also, I wonder if anyone watching had the same question as me: Did Olly Murs have something stuffed down the front of his trousers? and if so: What was stuffed down the front of Olly's trousers? I bet it was one of John or Edwards socks. I definitely think he must of had a bit of artificial enhancement down below because it was bordering on obscene! Also the bulge hung to the left, so unless Olly was channeling Terry Wogan what was going on down there? Moving on from those questions, Simon Cowell told Olly, I know what it's like working with two witches. Ohhh catty! Simon also commented that Olly had style, grace, and charisma.

Lloyd Daniels was next and he was in trouble before he even came out onstage and started singing. In the interviews they show before the performances Simon Cowell ominously stated: I hope Cheryl doesn't pick some obvious song like Fly Me To The Moon for him. Well Simon may have a future as a psychic because that's exactly the song Cheryl picked for Lloyd, Fly Me To The Moon by Frank Sinatra. Lloyd wore a white tuxedo shirt, white waistcoat, black skinny tie, and black tuxedo pants. Since he's only 16 he definitely didn't have the maturity to sing any type of big band song and honestly I feel like he should be in school rather than on X Factor. During his performance he gave a cheesy wink at the camera that was truly cringeworthy. His voice was totally drowned out by the band and maybe for that we should be grateful since he was singing in a monotone fashion anyway. To make up for the make that he can't sing he decided to do a backflip on stage halfway through the song. Well as you can imagine that went down like a lead boat. After the backflip Simon immediately shot Lloyd a dirty look, oh if only looks could kill then we'd have one less performance to sit through! I also feel like besides being rubbish he has a very vacant look, I don't know if that is down to age or what. Louis Walsh stated that Lloyd needed to be part of a group or boyband in order to become successful. In a classic Simon Cowell quip he stated: Doing a backflip while singing Fly Me To The Moon is like eating a sandwich while swimming. I found that quite funny. He also told Lloyd he needed to get some confidence.

Onto one of the more promising acts, Miss Frank. They wore similar black and white pinstriped suits and Graziella was holding a cane. The trio sang a jazzier version of That's Life by Frank Sinatra. Miss Frank had been critized in previous weeks for not gelling together as a group, I have to say they did a better job with that this week. No one sang over each other, the only part of their performance I didn't like was Graziella's rapping. She somehow worked Simon and Louis' name into her rap, which in my opinion isn't very hip hop it's more like looking for brownie points from the judges. Graziella seems to hog the limelight a little bit which I hope won't work against them in the future. However, I seems to be in the minority since all the judges loved the rapping and at the end of the song the audience gave them a standing ovation. Also, I don't know what happened at the end of Miss Frank's performance when Graziella wobbled a bit and ended up banging into Shaniece. Simon said it was the first time they looked like a group and he genuinely hoped that they would stay in the competition. While Dermot O'Leary was asking Miss Frank for a response they all started talking and forgot to hold the mic up to their mouth so everyone could hear what they were saying! Man, no one said you had to be smart to be on X Factor.

Next up was Rachel Adedji and she had a lot to prove this week. After Rachel had been in the bottom two for the last two weeks running, she really had to give it everything she had to make sure it didn't happen again. Dannii Minogue finally fixed Rachel's hair and she had a bob this week instead of looking like a Rhianna clone. I guess Dannii finally got the message that it wasn't smart to make Rachel Adedji look like Rhianna. However, in saying that her outfit was a little weird. She wore a neon multicolored sequined mini dress that made her look like she could of been an extra in the movie Tron. But enough of that, Rachel chose to sing Proud Mary by Tina Turner. She had the help of female backup dancers who wore short gold sequined dresses. In my opinion Rachel's voice was getting lost in the grandeur of the horns and her voice is better suited to slow songs or ballads. She definitely didn't put the same amount of energy into Proud Mary as Tina Turner did that's for sure! Once again the judges really seemed to like it and Simon said it was like seeing a brand new competitor and thank god you lost the silly haircut. He further added: You had a superb performance and great vocals. So there's hope that Rachel will not end up in the bottom two this week.

Up next was Jamie Archer aka Jamie Afro. He wore a white tuxedo shirt, a black bowtie that was left untied around his neck because he's an idiot, and black sparkly pants. I really wish someone would grab a shaver and shave off Jamie's afro in the middle of the night while he was sleeping. He sang Angel O'Mine by Aynsley Lister however, later Louis said the song was by U2. Hmm, I think Louis might be wrong. Jamie Archer is a real showman onstage there's no doubting that, but the guy is a rubbish singer. After the performance, Louis was a bit aggravated and told Jamie that he cheated by not singing a big band song and in no way is Bono big band. I have to say that I don't often agree with Louis, but that is cheating. Simon retaliated with the nasty comment: You're not one to preach to us about musical taste knowing the two horrors that are coming out here! The two horrors were John and Edward, I guess that's Simon's new pet name for them.

Stacey Solomon aka Horse Face performed next. She wore a floor length one shoulder cross strapped silver sparkly dress. She gave some sob story about how she wanted to sing this song for her son. Michael Buble specifically told her to pretend she was singing it directly to her son so that the emotion would come through, but I guess Horse Face Stacey must of been thinking about jumping fences or something and failed to listen. Stacey sang When You Wish Upon A Star by Jiminy Cricket aka Cliff Edwards. As I said before because she chose to ignore Michael Buble's advice the performance had no emotion. Simon said that she looked better than she sounded, the whole thing was very robotic, and she need to learn some performance skills. Dannii then proceeded to tell a story that this week Stacey Solomon came running into her room in a flood of tears and was having a bad week. Stacey looked very uncomfortable at the fact that Dannii had shared such a personal story and what was obviously a private moment.

Danyl Johnson has become my favorite competitor in this competition, while I really didn't like him at first I think he has become a lot more humble and toned down his over the top performances. He wore a white tuxedo shirt, black suit, and untied black bowtie. He sang the song Feeling Good by Nina Simone. I think this was an excellent song choice for him, and the song style really suited him. Not only did Danyl Johnson sing the song really well, but he definitely put on an entertaining performance. After he finished Simon gave him a standing ovation. Simon also told Danyl that he is in a completely different league to the rest of the contestants. Louis told him he was born to sing and entertain.

Another snoozer was next, Joe McElderry. He said he was going to be sexy for this performance and to be honest I think I could hear Simon laughing from my couch. He wore a black ugly suit that was very reminiscent of Hugh Hefner's smoking jacket. Joe sang Sway by Dean Martin. Talk about robotic, his salsa dance moves were as stiff as you can get. The dance moves also looked really cheesy and made him look a little creepy. The performance on the whole I could liken to one you would see on a cruise ship. Simon came up with a weird analogy but somehow I think it was correct, he said: You've got as much Latin flair as a dolphin.

A surprisingly good performance tonight came from Lucie Jones. Lucy sang My Funny Valentine from the show Babes In Arms. She wore a black and red floor length dress which was accesorized by a chunky black ring. The arrangement of the song was in the style so that Lucie could sing the song in a sexy, sultry fashion. I think this was a good choice for her, and her voice really suited big band. Overall, she did a pretty good job. However, the only thing that would ruin the whole sultry thing was the fact that Lucie had a big spot on her chin and the camera kept zooming in on it. Her performance ended in a shower of pink rose petals, one of which got stuck in her hair. She had the rose petal in her hair during the judges comments until Simon pointed it out to her, she just laughed, took it out, and said thank you. Simon commented that she sang the song like an actress and an angry Louis shouted: What are you looking for?!

The last and also most controversial act of the competition, John and Edward. Before their performance Simon claimed that if John and Edward win X Factor he will leave the country. I mean come on now is that really a threat? Oh poor Simon what will you do leave the rainy UK to go spend time in you multimillion dollar home in LA like you do anyway? Please! Anyway, John and Edward sang She Bangs by Ricky Martin and what that had to do with big band I really couldn't tell you. Also those two little slugs haven't banged anything yet except maybe their head when they were younger, which would explain a lot. Continuing their awful taste in fashion they wore similar suits, one in red and one in lime green. They also had backing dancers to try to take the attention away from them, the girls wore polka dot bras and tutus. During the song when one of the girls came to dance between the twins they both looked visibly uncomfortable. Also, for half the song John and Edward forgot to actually sing, what's up with that? It is a singing competition after all! Of course they added the obligatory embarrassing dance moves that correlate to the lyrics of the song, akin to something you'd see at 3 in the morning on See Hear. Another bizarre moment during their performance was when the twins got down on all fours and girls pretend to ride them like they were horses. Stacey Solomon must of been thanking her lucky stars that they didn't try that with her. After the performance finished John and Edward received boo's from the crowd and someone in the audience shouted RUBBISH! Simon said the song was appalling, to which Louis fired back: Simon once signed a group called Zig and Zag. Cheryl confessed that the twins had become her guilty pleasure. John and Edward proceeded to thank Simon for the dance moves and they left.

Results to follow!

Miss Frank Kicked Out

Well if you're wondering who was kicked off X Factor on Sunday October 25th, the answer is Miss Frank aka Graziella Affinita, Shaniece Davis, and Shar Alexandra.

I must start by saying I wasn't the biggest fan of Cheryl and Dannii's dresses tonight, they were a bit wacky for my taste. Cheryl wore a strange silver sequined dress that was very short and resembled either snake skin or scales. Cheryl's dress also had quite a revealing V neck and and long sleeved bolero in the same style as her dress. Dannii wore a flesh colored halterneck knee length dress, which had lace details and silver sparkles.

So the song all the contestants had to mime this week was Fascination by Alphabeat. All the contestants wore black and white themed outfits. For some reason this week all the dancing and singing to Alphabeat was incredibly cheesy. Danyl Johnson is still really bad a miming and after 3 weeks John and Edward are still out of time with the music! It really got a bit much when they broke out white tambourines and threw them up in the air as well as banging it on their bums.

Westlife are apparently trying to make a comeback and were on X Factor to promote their new single What About Now. The boyband performed the song and they were pretty dull as normal, but have moved away from sitting on chairs, wait for it...they're now standing while they sing ballads. Westlife seemed to be trying to go for a mature Take That type of sound, but it just wasn't working for them.

Host Dermot O'Leary commented that last night's episode with all the bantering between Louis and Simon was like watching an episode of Grumpy Old Men.

Michael Buble was also on the show singing his new single Cry Me A River. He was dressed in a black tuxedo and looked very James Bond. This quite fit in with the theme of the song since it reminded me of a James Bond movie theme song. While I'm not a Michael Buble fan, I have to admit the guy does have a powerful voice and put on an effortless performance. After Michael finished the song someone from the audience screamed I LOVE YOU! Michael responded by saying: I love you too stranger in the dark! When Dermot asked Michael who his favorite contestant was he said it was Rachel Adedji adding: She blew me away.

After his interview with Michael Buble, Dermot had a bit of a dig at past X Factor guests like Robbie Williams and Whitney Houston by saying: It's so nice to interview an international star that isn't weird.

Miss Frank and Danyl Johnson found themselves in the bottom two this week and both had to sing for their survival.

Miss Frank chose to sing Love Don't Live Here Anymore by Lady Antebellum, this turned out to be a bad song choice for them. Their voices worked against each other and they didn't looked like they gelled as group again. Graziella tried to upstage Shaniece and Shar by standing in front of them and doing her rap again. Graziella's rap has become really annoying and totally lost its novelty factor.

I cannot believe that Danyl Johnson was in the bottom two considering he had the best performance on Saturday night. It was obvious that Simon was not happy about this either saying: I think it's a joke you're in this position. Danyl sang With A Little Help From My Friends by The Beatles. He starting slipping back into his bad habits of going a bit over the top, but in saying that he still put on a great performance and gave it a lot of effort.

Louis decided to keep Miss Frank of course, Simon voted for Danyl, Dannii voted for Danyl, and stupid Cheryl couldn't make up her peabrain and decided to make it a deadlock decision by voting for Miss Frank.

As I said the vote was Deadlocked and the result depended on the public voted, which luckily Danyl Johnson got the most public votes and stays in the competition.

Miss Frank claimed they were going to stay together as a group and keep performing, yeah right I bet you they won't even make it out of the building together, but at least we don't have to hear anymore silly rapping so bye bye!

On next week's X Factor the mentor will be Bon Jovi and musical guest JLS

X Factor 2009 - Live Auditions 2 - Saturday 17th October

The 2nd live audition of X Factor 2009 was shown on Saturday 17th of August and had the usual mix of outstanding performances and unusual song choices! We're down to 11 contestants at this stage after Kandy Rain getting kicked out in the first X Factor 2009 live audition. The theme of tonight's show was Diva song's in honour of special guest Whitney Houston. Clive Davis was also present he discovered Whitney Houston's talent many years ago and Simon Cowell paid tribute to him at the start calling Clive Davis his mentor.

Dannii Minogue was sporting some awful birds nest hairdo tonight who knows what she was thinking. Louis Walsh was still not present after the death of Stephen Gately. Lucie Jones was first up wearing a blue mini dress that seemed to make her legs go on for miles. She's looking much better now after the X Factor makeover. That idiot dance coordinator guy Brian Friedman popped up to tell us some unimportant rubbish. Lucie Jones sang How Will I Know by Whitney Houston and went for more of a dance routine this time rather than the way she usually does it. Simon Cowell told her she's never going to be Whitney which we all know but it was a decent performance.

Olly Murs was up next. The most boring man on the planet was wearing a gray silver suit with black skinny tie and white shirt. Olly Murs sang Tina Turner's A Fool In Love and I thought the whole thing was a bit karaoke. Olly Murs seems to have developed some sort of awful leg shake thing when he sings that Dermot has dubbed the 'Olly Shake'. It's awful. Cheryl said this was the best performance that Olly Murs has done.

Miss Frank were up next and Shar seemed to have a bracelet on that looked like an acorn. Hmm. Miss Frank were dressed up in black and red outfits tonight I guess they're still trying to keep their own individual styles. They sang He Fills Me Up by Whitney Houston. I thought it was OK, Simon didn't! He said it was awful and got the crowds back up in his usual panto bad guy style. Simon did have another little argument with Cheryl Cole. Cheryl said it took Girls Aloud 2 years to get their act together properly. Simon said it was more like three.

Rachel Adedji was gushing over Whitney Houston a bit during the rehearsal. She started off her performance lying down on the stage and sang If I Were A Boy by Beyonce. Rachel Adedji was wearing a denim military jacket and black leather trousers. Dermot O'Leary was complaining about her heels as she was towering over him. I wonder how tall Dermot O'Leary is? Simon Cowell said he liked it but didn't love it as it was too close to the original song.

Joe McElderry as he now seems to be known sang Whitney Houston's Where Do Broken Hearts Go and was dressed all in black. He did a good job I just find him really boring, almost Olly Murs dull. Joe McElderry is the new Gareth Gates. Everyone loved it including the judges I think Simon made a little joke about him improving his performance by working with his big sister which might have been in reference to Cheryl. Definitely some relation there!

Danyl Johnson sang a new Whitney Houston song which is off her new album. Something about strength or being strong. Maybe I Didn't Know My Own Strength. Danyl Johnson kept his fashion simple wearing a black shirt and jeans. Dannii said his performance was flawless.

Lloyd Daniels started off with some garbage from the vocal coach Yvie Burnett. Who Cares. He sang an absolutely awful version of Leona Lewis's Bleeding Love. Oh my did Cheryl give him bad advice on song choice or what. Lloyd Daniels was wearing a gray shirt and waistcoat. He looked like he was frozen to the spot for the whole song and the whole thing didn't really work for him. Simon Cowell said it was like a mouse trying to climb a mountain, the song was far too big for him. Cheryl started crying at this point and tried to explain why she chose this song and how she took responsibility. Lloyd Daniels jumped over to give her a hug and make her feel a bit better.

John and Edward sang Britney Spears Oops I did it Again. Just when you think these kids couldn't get anymore annoying they step up with this performance. There was some terrible dancing with luggage carts and unfortunately for us they decided to copy Britney and wear the red PVC suits. Terrible. John and Edward are like the male version of the Cheeky Girls. They walked behind the judges for the talking part of the song and one of the gave the other a piece of jewelery just like in the Britney Spears video it was terrible. Simon said, what the bloody hell was that? He also said it was the worst live performance he's ever seen on X Factor.

My favourite Rikki Loney still hasn't got that annoying eyebrow fixed. He had a black suit and purple scarf on. Whitney Houston seemed to be a bit annoyed at Rikki Loney as he'd chosen to sing Respect by Aretha Franklin. Mostly because Rikki Loney is garbage and couldn't do the song justice. Simon said he turned from a pub singer to a wedding singer and the song was too big for him.

Jamie Archer sang Christina Aguilera's Hurt and wore a white v neck t shirt and a silver shark tooth necklace. Does anyone know why he wears a towel in his back pocket? I know he's trying to make it his thing but why? It's ridiculous. Simon said he was perfect.

Stacey Solomon was wearing a one shoulder strapped black polka dot knee length dress. She sang Etta James's At Last. Simon said that Stacey Solomon looked uncomfortable the whole time but I thought her performance went well.

Results will follow on Sunday the 18th of October 2009.

Rikki Loney Kicked Out

Well once again the results show was filled with controversy. First off I have to get into Cheryl Cole and Danni Minogue's dresses. Dannii Minogue was wearing a fuchsia strapless, ruffled mini dress accessorized with a wide black belt. What was the deal with Dannii Minogue's hair?! It looked like she was channeling a trailer park with her mullet style hairdo. I guess for this show Dannii was all business in the front and party in the back. Cheryl Cole looked much better as always, she was wearing a gold sequined, strapless mini dress. Has anyone ever noticed the shoes Dannii and Cheryl wear, I always wonder how high their shoes are and what size are they?

To kick off the show once again all the contestants had to preform the obligatory ridiculous mime to a song. Irish twins John and Edward definitely gave away the fact that the song wasn't sung live, come on these two nuggets can't even mime a song properly! This week the song was Queen of the Night by Whitney Houston. Obviously this song was picked in honor of Whitney's appearance on the show. So all in all that part of the show is just to waste time because the people aren't even singing live.

While on the subject of not singing live, there has been many rumors floating around this week that X Factor judge Cheryl Cole may not preform her new single Fight For This Love live. I heard that people had said that she was intimidated by having to preform on the same night as Whitney Houston, so she'd rather pre-record the track and mime. Although when it came down to it I have to give her credit Cheryl Cole sang live and did a pretty good job. Fellow Girls Aloud bandmates, Nadine Coyle, Sarah Harding, Nicola Roberts, and Kimberly Walsh, were there to support Cheryl. Ashley Cole affair (as I like to call him), Cheryl's husband, was also on hand I guess to support but once again he just looked like an idiot that would rather be somewhere else than at the X Factor supporting his wife, Ashley Cole is such a sleaze! Cheryl wore a red military jacket, military style hat, black trousers that were open at the sides, and a black sheer top. She also had about 50 backing dancers who were all men dressed in military uniforms. The funniest part after the performance was when Dermot O'Leary was talking to Cheryl she had red lipstick all smudge on her chin from the mic. Dermot also asked Simon Cowell what he thought of the performance, which was kind of stupid because of course he gave Cheryl loads of praise and said her single would be #1 this week. Cheryl finished off by thanking everyone for letting her be on the show and supporting her as a new judge. However, isn't she a little late with this thank you speech since she's been on the show 2 years already?!

Ok, now it was time for Whitney Houston's performance which was supposed to be her big UK comeback and her first UK performance in 10 years. This all seemed pretty promising as on Saturday Whitney was back in fine form and actually giving the contestants good advice. However, Whitney Houston's comeback looked like it was on shaky ground after her performance of her new single Million Dollar Bill. Million Dollar Bill is an uptempo song and Whitney looked like she couldn't keep up the pace and her vocals were definitely not what they once were. Whitney also had a wardrobe malfunction during her song, the back strap of her silver floor length sparkly dress broke. She's singing a song about million dollar bills and she's got on a cheap quality dress that breaks when you're just singing not even dancing what's that about? Also, during the song money exploded onto the stage, I think Whitney confused herself with a big time rapper or something. After the song, Whitney looked absolutely exhausted as she spoke with Dermot, and I don't know if anyone else noticed that she seemed to be a bit spaced out like she used to be. Dermot also commented on the fact that Whitney didn't sugar coat what she thought of any of the contestants singing, she said Yeah that's why Simon calls me lippy. She followed that by saying I just speak my mind exactly like Simon Cowell. So in summary I don't think the old Whitney Houston diva is back to 100% yet.

On a side note I found it a little weird that during the show Simon Cowell's mic broke and he had to use Dermot's.

So the bottom two this week came down to once again the poor Rachel Adedji who looked like she was going to have a nervous breakdown when she realized she was in the bottom two for a second week in a row. Rikki Loney was also in the bottom two with his one weird eyebrow that sticks up, really you're telling me they couldn't have fixed that by now?

Rachel decided to sing With or Without You by U2. She was visibly upset and frustrated that she had a pretty decent performance on Saturday but still managed to end up here again. She just shook her head as she walked down the stairs to begin the song. Once again she did a pretty decent job, a little gravely in parts, but after the song she completely lost it and broke down into tears.

Rikki Loney sang Westlife's Flying Without Wings because he claimed it was his favorite song, well if that's the case he really needs to get out more. While the judges voted Rikki kept begging please, please, please it was really quite pathetic.

Since Louis was absent again he couldn't cast a vote, Dannii voted for Rachel to stay, Cheryl voted for Rikki to stay, and the deciding vote came down to Simon who wanted Rachel to stay in the competition. Rikki starting crying and Cheryl came onstage to give him a hug, when Dermot asked Cheryl her thoughts on this outcome she said I just can't believe that this has happened Rikki has been voted out and John and Edward get to stay here. Oooh snap! But she is right John and Edward have stayed in the competition for entertainment value.

Well Rikki Loney is out and must pack his bags and return to Glasgow, bye bye!